So you've bagged a seat in your nearest Irish boozer, scrummed your way to the bar and ordered a pint of the black stuff, and your furry shamrock hat is firmly ensconced on the head: congratulations, you are officially ready to start celebrating St Patrick's Day. But who is St Patrick? We trace the history of the brewer's favourite saint back to ancient Roman Britain.
Irish or not, Catholic or not, and whether you actually like Guinness or not – these are small considerations now that the 17th of March is an international day of merry-making and general festivity.
It's an excuse to wear as much green as you like, even if you're blond. But before you go digging that pea-green jumper out of the back of the wardrobe, you might want to ask yourself what on earth you're going to all this trouble for.